Fourth of July fun costs two NFL players their fingers

When the NFL booked Katy Perry to do the Super Bowl halftime show, it had no way of knowing “Firework” would become the theme song of the offseason.

Two – two! – NFL players are reportedly missing fingers following Fourth of July fireworks mishaps.

In a potential flouting of medical privacy laws, ESPN’s Adam Schefter reported that Giants defensive end Jason Pierre-Paul had his right index finger amputated Wednesday afternoon. He even tweeted out a picture of the medical chart in case you weren’t sure how accurate his source is.

As it turns out, doctors determined that amputation was the best option for Pierre-Paul to continue his career. Apparently he could be ready to return to the Giants in as little as six weeks.

Of course, that is contingent on the Giants still wanting him around. Pierre-Paul neglected to sign his one-year, $14.8 million franchise tender before his accident, so the team is within its rights to withdraw the offer if it feels so inclined.

There is precedent for playing without a full set of digits. Ronnie Lott had the tip of his left pinky amputated so he wouldn’t miss the 1986 season. And in baseball, the last ace to lead the Cubs to a World Series title was a pitcher named Three-Finger Brown, though technically he should have gone by the less catchy “Three-and-a Half Finger” Brown.

Buccaneers cornerback C.J. Wilson might not be so lucky.

Wilson’s father told a Charlotte TV station that his son lost a pair of fingers over the weekend due to a faulty firework that exploded before popping out of its canister.

Unfortunately, he will have a much tougher road back onto the field than Pierre-Paul. As a defensive lineman, JPP can probably keep up the same level of production with one less finger – most of his work is done with arms and torso.

As a cornerback, having two less fingers around when your job is to tip and intercept passes makes life nearly impossible. On top of that, Wilson has only played four games in his two NFL seasons – two with the Bears and two with the Bucs. In this case his handicap may be too much to overcome to continue his NFL dream.

Suffice it to say, the tales of Pierre-Paul and Wilson should lead to a bit more caution around the NFL next Independence Day.

Federal judge rules to cancel Redskins trademark

The Washington Redskins, at least as currently named, were dealt a major defeat by federal judge Gerald Bruce Lee on Wednesday.

Lee upheld a previous ruling and ordered the federal Patent and Trademark Office to cancel the team’s trademark on the name on the grounds that it is disparaging to Native Americans.

The franchise can still use the name, but will have a more difficult time winning lawsuits involving trademark infringement.

As expected, the team is appealing the ruling.

“I am surprised by the judge’s decision to prevent us from presenting our evidence in an open trial,” team president Bruce Allen said in a statement released Wednesday. “We look forward to winning on appeal after a fair and impartial review of the case. We are convinced that we will win because the facts and the law are on the side of our franchise that has proudly used the name Redskins for more than 80 years.”

Lee’s precedent for denying the team’s use of the name on freedom of speech grounds was very recent, citing a Supreme Court decision allowing the state of Texas to prohibit depiction of the Confederate battle flag on specialty license plates for the Sons of Confederate Veterans organization.

NFL agrees to 10-year London deal in new stadium

Bad news, Jaguars fans – the NFL in London isn’t going anywhere for a long, long time. And we know how they like to use your team as a guinea pig for the English.

On Wednesday the league announced a 10-year deal, beginning in 2018, to play at least two regular-season games per year at English soccer club Tottenham Hotspur’s new “state of the art” stadium. The facility will feature a retractable grass field with artificial turf underneath that will be used for American football.

Alas, this is not an exclusive agreement. Absurdly, commissioner Roger Goodell stated that games may also take place at other venues in the UK  over the course of the agreement.

As annoying as this is for the fans of every team that gets one less home game per year, at least one man is happy – London mayor Boris Johnson.

“Anyone who has seen American Football at Wembley Stadium cannot fail to have been thrilled by the spectacle, and the wise heads that run the NFL have clearly not missed the fact that Londoners are going absolutely gangbusters for Gridiron,” Johnson said. “Touchdowns in Tottenham can only add to our reputation as a global sporting powerhouse, and help us take another step towards our goal of having a permanent NFL franchise here in London.”

Did you see that? They’re gangbusters for gridiron! Top-notch, Boris, top-notch!

Tootle-loo.